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December 05 Just complaining... やれやれ... Microsoft spaces live doesn't support RUBY displaying... 残念だ... October 18 A quote for life, for people who got affected in the current Monetary Crisis..."You hold the answers deep within your own mind. Consciously, you've forgotten it. That's the way the human mind works. Whenever something is too unpleasant, too shameful for us to entertain, we reject it. We erase it from our memories. But the imprint is always there." "We're supposed to try and be real. And I feel alone, and we're not together. And that is real." "You're not alone, honey." "Never... Never." "But the imprint is always there. Nothing is ever really forgotten." "God, please don't hate me" ---- From the song "Understanding (Wish it all away)" of Evanescene TAKE CARE, PEOPLE. August 19 Delicious Collections [1]
迄今为止在多伦多找到的第二家吃过桥米线的地方。明显比第一家好吃多了。 地点：靠近HWY-7 & Woodbine 的FMP (First Markham Place, 仿似又称“万锦广场”) 的 Food Court 靠窗的角落里。 感兴趣的人多多捧场，因为这个corner位好像总是经营不好，几个月甚至几个星期换一次老板，希望现在这间店能保持味道，而且越来越兴旺，这样才能在想吃过桥米线的时候还能有地方去。 不好意思，我是为了这个目的才这么花功夫把这家店post在网上的。嘻嘻。 March 04 梦想与现实的距离有多远？
这么远？
还是这么远？
...
不管多远都要一步步地走...
那就走吧~
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很好，外面又下着大雪～
不会真的是这个冬天的最后一场大雪吧？
いやだ~
January 29 纪念日东部时间（多伦多）
2008年1月29日下午2点30分 我和我的小三第一次见面
I've being fallen in love with him for 2 years...
He's my sweety handsome prince~
January 28 Warning...太甜了 会牙疼...
小心蛀牙...
爱上一首歌：
Flow
愛と名がついたものを見せてよ
どんな色をしているの？ どんなにあおい？ 手触りも教えて いったい 誰が隠し持っているの？ 愛と名がついたものにいつか 出会う保証なんてない 愛してる こわれるくらい 愛してる 傷つくくらい 愛してる どうしてこんなわたしをあなた抱きしめるの？ 花びらも砂も陽の光も やさしさのように降り注ぐ 欲しいもの 足りないもの わたしの手には あり過ぎて 愛してる あなた信じて 愛してる この手伸ばして 愛してる 激しい想い わたしの心にうずまく こわれるくらい 愛してる 傷つくくらい 愛してる どうしてこんな私をあなた抱きしめるの？ あなた信じて 愛してる この手伸ばして 愛してる 激しい想い わたしの心にうずまく September 17 graduating...毕业了，感觉梦想就越走越远了。
人越来越现实，能不现实吗，能幻想的余地都没有了...
越来越觉得梦想真的只能在梦里想，现实中只是一个个小泡泡，还没飘起来就幻灭了～
算了，总有这样一天的...
虽然还有很多plan，却越来越没有实现的信心，越来越怀疑自己的计划可不可行... 更怀疑自己的能力...
倒是和Winsy感觉一样，老妈比我们自己还雄心壮志规划着我们的未来...
省省，出国不是就可以飞了，而是需要更加脚踏实地的自己走，慢慢的走...
无所谓吧，管他多少钱每小时的工资，只要够吃的，有睡的，先移了民，拿了passport再说...
跟律师谈了谈，这过程据说还要四五年... 我那时就要26、27了... 奔三了... 可怕...
终于要开始吃苦了～
其实还是有点期待的，苦日子过后我会变凤凰吗？
这句话通俗点说是：苦日子过后我能变有钱吗？
哈哈，拜金主义～ 没办法，钱虽不是万能，可是没有钱真的万事不能~
日子一天天流逝，生活必需继续，那我也继续继续吧～
真希望有一天可以在天上飞～～～lala～～
放上一首Kelly Clarkson的歌，曲调颓废的刚好适合我的心境～
"Addicted"
It's like you're a drug It's like you're a demon I can't face down It's like I'm stuck It's like I'm running from you all the time And I know I let you have all the power It's like the only company I seek is misery all around It's like you're a leech Sucking the life from me It's like I can't breathe Without you inside of me And I know I let you have all the power And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm lost It's like I'm giving up slowly It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me Leave me alone And I know these voices in my head Are mine alone And I know I'll never change my ways If I don't give you up now It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm not me I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can't take it Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it I'll handle it, quit it Just one more time Then that's it Just a little bit more to get me through this I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can't take it Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it I'll handle it, quit it Just one more time Then that's it Just a little bit more to get me through this It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm not me July 07 Questions of Life Everyday, I just passed by a tree with a cenotaph on campus in front of DC library. I thought it was for a remarkable professor or someone who passed away. Finally, I stopped today, read the person's name "Tara Quach" and search it online, and... figured out that she was just a general person who is also a UW math & business 3rd year student and was dead causing by a motorcycle accident on July 6th, 2005.
Read some words about her:
Tara was 22 years old. Smart, funny, just a great person to be around.
I did not know her very well, but I am still affected by her passing on.
...
She was a mathy, a very bright girl who loved to have fun.
I can still hear her trying to pursuade everybody to go out to the bar
with her "Come on...you don't need to study...it's a friday night...it'll be FuuuUn, come on..."
Always with a great big smile on her face.
Then there were her "I KnOW"'s, those I will never forget.
Mostly because the boys always mocked her for them
...
She was bubbly and happy and very chatty (as usually :) ).
She was a talker, smiler and laugher, the kind of person who was just pleasant to be around.
Although I did not keep in touch with her very well
I am sad that I will never again randomly run into her on campus.
Seeing her always lifted my spirits.
...
She's just a general person, but memorized by lots of people in hearts with love. Though she passed away when she's still too young to fulfill her beatiful dreams, but I think she's happy since she brought lots of happiness to people around her. How about me? What did I do? If someday I died, is there gonna be someone who will notice my death? Is there gonna be anybody who remembers my existence in his/her life?
Again, the same questions came to me:
Who am I?
Where am I?
What am I doing?
Am I alive?
What am I living for?
July 03 something, sometime, that passed away...引用某同学的msn签名：
“总有一天你会怀念 如今伸手可及的日子” 人总是在得不到的时候异常渴望
失去时才懂得珍惜
how do we call this?
---- 犯贱
话外题：
We went to Wasaga Beach lately.
Beatiful weather, huh?
Actually, it was below 20 Celsius degrees, we jumped into the water, and... FREEZING cold... May 10 关于Ke的问题～Ke小朋友，让我这个Ke来回答你的问题： 你说：如果选择快乐了就真的能快乐 那为什么还是会有人选择悲伤 难道只是作茧自缚？ 人的情绪总会有低潮期，这是不可避免的，因为人有七情六欲，连圣人都很难抛下它们，凡人又怎么可能轻易的控制它们呢？所以大部分难过的人不是因为它们选择悲伤，而是脱离悲伤，愈合伤口，他们需要时间。选择快乐的人，在这段必经的愈合期过后，一定能够幸福起来。而不知道如何选择快乐，或者不知道要选择快乐的人，将一直悲伤下去。 就是这么简单。明白了吗？ 嘻嘻～ May 05 一个人的电影院2007年5月4日23点零分。EST。 一个人走进电影院。买票。抱着加大可乐和Nachos，进了6号厅看Spider Man III。 It was great. 尤其是在Harry葬礼结束后, Peter的独白。具体怎么说的忘记了，意思大概记得： You always have choices. You can choose what is right to do. 其实人生就是这样，幸不幸福完全取决于自己的态度，自己的选择。你选择快乐，你的人生就会感到幸福，满足。 其实，不管再怎么不幸，在这个世界上还是会有很多比你更不幸的人。即使在这些人中，依然会有人过的很幸福，因为他们选择快乐，选择了这样的人生态度，所以才会感到幸福。 5月5日凌晨1点30分，独自走出电影院。抬头看见夜空深邃的迷人，每一颗星星都明亮的像闪烁的钻石，很美很美。 打开车窗，开着车，在无人的街道上，合着音乐，放声唱着： 当黑夜 清晰过白昼 当快乐 赔上了所有 当理智 熬不过放纵 我的神色 什么都算了 却还守着爱 飘着 … 自己快要融化在这么美的感觉中，带着一点悲伤，一点释怀，一点幸福和几分惬意… 就是这么的喜欢，喜欢夜的黑，夜的宁静，夜的凉爽，夜的清醒… 就这样，飘着… April 20 ...Something In the Way... "I don't have the passion anymore so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away." ---- Kurt Cobain Negative. Yet BRILLIANT! He had beautiful light blue eyes. He was the HERO in Rock. He was one of the leaders of Grunge. 'N he passed away from us at his 27th in 1994. But I do NOT think he made a wrong decision about his death. This is who he WAS. This is where sometimes life goes.      ">
I LOVE YOU, Kurt! I miss you. I miss NIRVANA. I miss the feeling of your songs.  All Apologies What else should I be All apologies What else should I say Everyone is gay What else could I write I don’t have the right What else should I be All apologies In the sun In the sun I feel as one In the sun In the sun I'm married... Burried I wish I was like you Easily amused Find my nest of salt Everything is my fault I’ll take all the blame Aqua seafoam shame Sunburn with freezerburn Choking on the ashes of her enemy In the sun In the sun I feel as one In the sun In the sun I'm married... Burried All and all is all we all are  Thanks to have your music with me those years and... lonely now... ...You Know You Are Right... April 09 Random Thoughts...人没有了欲望就会变得可怕。 举个例子： 某天学习学得很不爽，想发泄发泄， 却因不知道自己想要什么、想干什么而无从寻找发泄出口。 这是一种悲哀。 然后悲哀继续这样恶性循环下去... 谁来解救？ 自己。 如何解救？ 仍在探索中 ... March 29 random"Just because something is difficult doesn't mean you shouldn't try it means you should try it HARDER" "change before you have to" March 24 致曾经的爱人intro...
********************************************* 该忘了你对不对 (周蕙) 大雨过后的眼泪 挂在充满回忆的橱窗
我却不想忘以往 那些心碎的心创 记忆是一个行囊 陪伴着我到世界流浪
我让悲伤都装上翅膀 再见了就不能倔强 该忘了你对不对 怕自己无法面对 无怨无悔 把一切留给纪念
受过沉默的创伤 它会慢慢被岁月 一片片填满 渐渐就习惯不再想 忘记曾经最痛的地方 该忘了你对不对 我应该坚强面对 学会遗忘 不能像爱的挣扎
记忆会为我收藏 那些美丽时光 为爱付出过的力量 带着爱去寻找 幸福的希望 ********************************************
因为爱
所以 学着放手 给你你要的自由 给你你要的幸福 疼痛留给自己 悲伤 一个人承担 至少 我还能选择记忆 留下美好 愿你一直能够拥有你要的幸福 outro... ******************************************** 谁说要忘了一个人最好的方法是再找个一个人？！ 我说这是最笨的方法，真的爱着的那个人，怎么可能会被其他人轻易取代？！满满的回忆怎么可能轻易更换主角？！ 结果只会是伤害自己，也伤害第二个人... 心灵的创伤，只能够自己一个人消化，等待时间的冲刷才是最终的解决方案。除此之外，别无他法... March 16 Return!好久没有回来了，有半年多了吧...
这个地方快被我遗忘了...
一来呢，是因为前段时间对microsoft极度不满，二来呢，是因为也没有什么想写的说...
下面是「死神 Bleach」中我喜欢的部分卷首语：
 1.
我等は姿無きが故にそれを畏れ 姿無き故に敬う かくて刃は振り下ろされる 我们因无形而被畏惧 因无形而被敬仰 就这样挥下刀刃 我等は姿無きが故にそれを畏れ そして再び刃は振り下ろされる 仮面の名の下に 我们因无形而可怕 于是再一次挥下手中的刀刃 以假面为名 2. もし わたしが雨だったなら それが永遠に交わることのない 空と大地を繋ぎ留めるように 誰かの心を繋ぎ留めることができただろうか 如果我是那雨滴的话， 那么，我能够像把不曾交会的天空和大地连接起来那样... 把某人的心串联起来吗？ 3. そう、我々に運命などない 無知と恐怖にのまれ 足を踏み外したものたちだけが 運命と呼ばれる濁流の中へと 落ちてゆくのだ 没错，我们没有命运这种东西， 只有被无知与恐惧所吞没而失足的人们，才会堕入那被称之为命运的浊流之中。 4. 我々は涙を流すべきではない それは心に対する肉体の敗北であり 我々が心というものを 持て余す存在であるということの 証明に他ならないからだ 我们不应该流泪， 那对内心来说，等于是身体的败北。 那也只是，我们无法违心而存在的证明。 5. そう、何ものも わたしの世界を 変えられはしない 没错，无论是什么，都不能改变我的世界。 September 06 仿佛又要开学了...如题...又是一个新的开始...
Thinking about how to change/improve my life...
Graduating in a year...life seems becoming complicated...I'm facing more and more troubles and longer and longer To-Do-List.
I wanna slim my To-Do-List and solve, at least, most of the problems I'm facing right now, and I WILL try my best, since it's another brand new start.
Have to tell myself that all my wishes wont come true unless I work hard.
So, KAY, here's the words for you:
Be proud of yourself, there's no one in the world can take your place,
but you have to WORK HARD & WORK SMART.
However, dont forget to keep yourself and your life healthy. *IMPORTANT* September 05 What a pity!!! T__TJust saw the album "Northern West of China" from one of my friends' space. They must be taken during the journey in XinJiang this August after I came back to Canada (Aren't they, Seth?). I wanna go!!!! PITY that I didnt catch the chance...T___T
I swear I'll arrange a schedule and enjoy a trip there before I get old, and I swear I'll go visit Tibet when I'm still young TOO!!!
T___T
I WANNA GO!!! August 04 space has changed interface?space又改版了？这次改版还不错。我喜欢。虽然还没研究。  音乐对我的心情真的很有影响。最近总是在听一首很老很老的影视歌曲，草帽歌，80年代日本电影「人間の証明」的插曲，悲伤凄美的旋律，听过后就像幽灵一样缠绕着我，我像着了魔似的一遍又一遍的听，周围的空气都好像变得悲伤起来... |
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